Monday, May 21, 2012


I have officially gotten bored with Castleville on Facebook.  So now it's back to work.  :0)  Mike and I spent some time cleaning the back room yesterday, and I am feeling so much cleaner.  :0)  The soap shelves have been cleaned.  We've bought some lye.  Mike is taking off all next week.  Hopefully we'll get some soap made!  Among other things that we need to do.  :0)   We've been doing the family swim thing at the YMCA on Fridays.  And when I'm not sick I've done a little running at the track.  I can already tell a difference, although I haven't lost actual weight yet.  I just feel better in general.  Linus has figured out how to put his finger in his nose.  :0)
Molly is almost a kindergarten graduate!  Oh, what an adventure it has been!  

Keep Calm and Carry a Concealed Weapon!  I guess. :0)

Monday, May 14, 2012

Moving Forward

Well, I'm still sick, but now that I have a little coffee and orange juice in me I feel a bit better.  Mike thinks I should go to the doctor, but I really don't want to.  Instead I'm going to sit around watching tv and knitting.  If I get worse, I'll go, but I really think I'm fine.  I will do my best not to sneeze on the yarn.  

Linus is sleeping so much better in his own room now.  I'm so glad.  Molly is almost done with school.  She's almost a kindergarten graduate.  (Sniff, sniff.)  I'm not sure how I feel about the upcoming summer vacation.  It's only two months though.  I have two and a half weeks to get some things done for etsy before she's hanging around the house 24-7.  Oh, she'll probably be playing with the kids down the street all the time anyway.

For Mother's Day I lost my voice.  I wonder if that is symbolic in some way.  :D 

Here we go.

Friday, May 11, 2012

Mother's Day Is Here Again

It's been a rough couple of weeks.  Linus keeps rolling over when I change his diaper, pulling up on the rocking chair, and he's been a bit sick and doesn't want his nose cleaned.  Molly's as defiant as ever.  And demands attention when it is most inconvenient.  I was sick yesterday.  Still mood swingy.  :(   I think that's all the bad stuff. 

Linus's bumps and bruises have been pretty minor so far.  We got a new front door.  Linus has also discovered Yo Gabba Gabba. The garden is doing pretty well.  Although we planted a little too early and the corn didn't get very tall.  I think in a couple weeks we'll pull it up and plant some more. There are a whole bunch of potatoes and butternut squash though!

And it's Mother's Day.  And just like last year, it's a little bittersweet.  I love being a mother, but a daughter?  Not so much.  It is amazing I think that after all these years, knowing what I know, deciding what I've decided, doing what I've done,  and still at the age of 36, I can still feel so, so abandoned.  And I mean amazing in a bad way.  I'm not trying to be rescued.  I only want to take care of myself and my child, and somehow it hurts so much.  Every time I see or hear anything about telling your mom how much you appreciate her, my chest hurts.  If I do that, if I reach out with an olive branch then the expectation will be that things will go back to the way they were.  I can't allow that this time. 

As Dr. Phil says, "You can love someone and not love what they do."  

I love my mom.

Now that I've exercised that demon for the year, it's time to move on.  And Mr. Screamy needs to eat.

Happy Mother's Day!

Saturday, May 5, 2012

I don't like Blogger's "New Look".  And I can't figure out where my photo albums are on Facebook, nor how to put more pictures.  Maybe it was just taking too long.  And then I remembered that I hadn't blogged in awhile anyway.  Which leads me back to Blogger's new look.  Blah!  I usually try not to complain about change just on principle, but this whole social networking thing is getting me down.  Actually, I think I'm hormonal.  Like, really bad.  I got really depressed the other day. That hasn't happened to me in a long time.  Not like that anyway.  But I'm better now.  I'll probably get really angry in a few minutes though.  Stick my tongue out.  Like this :P

Until the anger comes enjoy this: