Monday, October 22, 2012

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

First Birthday Party Down!

If you read this blog at all you would know two things, 1. it's not that interesting  2. I have terrible sinus problems sometimes.

Well my sinuses have been puffy for weeks. It sucks.  I keep forgetting things, like names, and what I'm doing. 

But my boy had his first birthday. He's so big, he looks like a two year old. :0) I may be making a rug for someone. :0)  Fingers crossed.  I'm so excited. I haven't had a sale on etsy for months.  I have some stuff I need to get up on there.  It's the picture taking that I hate I think.  Who would've thought I would hate taking pictures.  Ha! ha!

More later, hopefully!  

Monday, September 10, 2012

Busy, Busy, Busy!

Oh, my goodness!  I forgot how much work a baby is. I am grateful for Yo Gabbagabba! (I am full of exclamation points today! I'm hoping it will trick my brain into finding new sources of energy!!!!!!!)  Oh!  And nap time!  Here's a list of what's going on with me:

1.  Linus is standing by himself now, and will walk from Mom to Dad and back if we make him.

2.  I joined the PTA!  

3.  I've been doing a little lap swimming at the YMCA!  But I don't want to share a lane, so I make Mike meet me there.  I can share a lane with him. :0)  Linus stays in the Child Watch.  I can't figure out if he likes it or not. 

4. Squash bugs ate our squash, watermelon, and squmpkins.  :0(

5. I did plant some lettuce though.  Fingers crossed!

6. We went to Molly's first conference for the first grade and the teacher said she is very positive and has good things to say about everyone.  This makes me so happy!

7. I still need to make more money!  I have made a couple more bath mats.  I plan on having them up this week as well as a couple other things.  Fingers crossed!

8.  Mike was off last week and we had a nice relaxing time and he got the garage cleaned out!  ;0)

9.  Now looking ahead to the next couple of months and I realize I have TWO birthday parties to plan!!!!!!!!!

Monday, July 2, 2012

More Soap!

Here's a picture of the tea tree oil soap.  And you can buy here.

 Have a Happy 4th!

Thursday, June 28, 2012

For Washing Almost Anything

I got a new listing up on etsy.  Washcloths in new colors.  :0)
I'll get the tea tree oil soap up this weekend and hopefully a couple other things.  Let me know what you think!


Wednesday, June 27, 2012

If You Are Going To Name Your Kid Linus

You have to make him a blue blanket, even if he doesn't suck his thumb and no matter how long it takes you!


Monday, June 25, 2012

This Summer

Our very first watermelon!

Molly decided to give herself bangs. I tried to fix it with crappy sewing scissors!

This one is just funny! :0)
 That's pretty much what's been going on around here.  Garden is doing okay.  Kids are doing kid stuff.  Mom is trying to hold it together.  :0)

Thursday, June 21, 2012

Some Days

Some days I feel sad and down for no real reason it seems.  Other days I feel free and floaty and dreamy and at peace.  But I keep thinking about seeds and plants. I think of the seeds that have evolved to catch the wind, like dandelions or those whirligig ones that come from some sort of tree.  Then I think maybe things are just meant to be this way.  Maybe forests just get too crowded and the seeds are meant to float far away because if they fall to the ground the sun will never reach them.  

Maybe it's okay to let the wind carry you far, far away from the forest. Maybe you are meant to find the wind when you are suffocating. 

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Just Sayin'

After countless Futurama episodes and that two hour long Monopoly game that of course did not get finished, I am so ready for school to start again.  :0)

Monday, June 18, 2012


After another week of drama (fevers, pee and other mishaps, broken desk chair, and teething), I am still on track.  Sort of.  The first batch of patchouli soap is just about done curing and I can't wait to take pictures of it for etsy.  Yay!  And I'm working on other stuff too.  I also bought some romaine lettuce seeds from an etsy shop called cubits. I'm really excited about it.  The weather has been mild this year so far (fingers crossed) and we've actually been getting food from the garden.  Imagine that.  Of course I won't plant the lettuce until the fall though. 

I'm also going to try and have a sewing lesson with Molly and we plan on making cookies.  :0)  

Lots of stuff coming soon.  

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

No More Drama

*One hail storm that prevented us from hiding in the cellar and for a brief moment I thought we were all going to die. 

*One replaced back windshield on my car already scarred from the hail storm two years ago.  

*One ruined $200 swimming pool.
*One printer unexpectedly dead of old age.

*One kindergarten graduation.

*One swallowed tooth.

*One attempt to pull the baby monitor camera down from the wall by the cord. 

*Many, many fatigue and hormone induced mood swings.


Sunday, June 3, 2012

Summer Vacation

Okay, I've still been playing Castleville.  Maybe one or two more trips to the Goodwill and a little more shifting around and my house won't be like hoarders anymore.  Not that it really ever was.  I mean, I'm just  a little messy.  It's not like I'm dirty. Ha. Ha. Anyway, Mike made some soap today and I'm working on a few things for etsy.  Molly's out of school though, and I know I'll have to keep her busy.  I think I might have to break down and find some kind of baby sitter.  I'm going crazy, little by little.  :0)

Monday, May 21, 2012


I have officially gotten bored with Castleville on Facebook.  So now it's back to work.  :0)  Mike and I spent some time cleaning the back room yesterday, and I am feeling so much cleaner.  :0)  The soap shelves have been cleaned.  We've bought some lye.  Mike is taking off all next week.  Hopefully we'll get some soap made!  Among other things that we need to do.  :0)   We've been doing the family swim thing at the YMCA on Fridays.  And when I'm not sick I've done a little running at the track.  I can already tell a difference, although I haven't lost actual weight yet.  I just feel better in general.  Linus has figured out how to put his finger in his nose.  :0)
Molly is almost a kindergarten graduate!  Oh, what an adventure it has been!  

Keep Calm and Carry a Concealed Weapon!  I guess. :0)

Monday, May 14, 2012

Moving Forward

Well, I'm still sick, but now that I have a little coffee and orange juice in me I feel a bit better.  Mike thinks I should go to the doctor, but I really don't want to.  Instead I'm going to sit around watching tv and knitting.  If I get worse, I'll go, but I really think I'm fine.  I will do my best not to sneeze on the yarn.  

Linus is sleeping so much better in his own room now.  I'm so glad.  Molly is almost done with school.  She's almost a kindergarten graduate.  (Sniff, sniff.)  I'm not sure how I feel about the upcoming summer vacation.  It's only two months though.  I have two and a half weeks to get some things done for etsy before she's hanging around the house 24-7.  Oh, she'll probably be playing with the kids down the street all the time anyway.

For Mother's Day I lost my voice.  I wonder if that is symbolic in some way.  :D 

Here we go.

Friday, May 11, 2012

Mother's Day Is Here Again

It's been a rough couple of weeks.  Linus keeps rolling over when I change his diaper, pulling up on the rocking chair, and he's been a bit sick and doesn't want his nose cleaned.  Molly's as defiant as ever.  And demands attention when it is most inconvenient.  I was sick yesterday.  Still mood swingy.  :(   I think that's all the bad stuff. 

Linus's bumps and bruises have been pretty minor so far.  We got a new front door.  Linus has also discovered Yo Gabba Gabba. The garden is doing pretty well.  Although we planted a little too early and the corn didn't get very tall.  I think in a couple weeks we'll pull it up and plant some more. There are a whole bunch of potatoes and butternut squash though!

And it's Mother's Day.  And just like last year, it's a little bittersweet.  I love being a mother, but a daughter?  Not so much.  It is amazing I think that after all these years, knowing what I know, deciding what I've decided, doing what I've done,  and still at the age of 36, I can still feel so, so abandoned.  And I mean amazing in a bad way.  I'm not trying to be rescued.  I only want to take care of myself and my child, and somehow it hurts so much.  Every time I see or hear anything about telling your mom how much you appreciate her, my chest hurts.  If I do that, if I reach out with an olive branch then the expectation will be that things will go back to the way they were.  I can't allow that this time. 

As Dr. Phil says, "You can love someone and not love what they do."  

I love my mom.

Now that I've exercised that demon for the year, it's time to move on.  And Mr. Screamy needs to eat.

Happy Mother's Day!

Saturday, May 5, 2012

I don't like Blogger's "New Look".  And I can't figure out where my photo albums are on Facebook, nor how to put more pictures.  Maybe it was just taking too long.  And then I remembered that I hadn't blogged in awhile anyway.  Which leads me back to Blogger's new look.  Blah!  I usually try not to complain about change just on principle, but this whole social networking thing is getting me down.  Actually, I think I'm hormonal.  Like, really bad.  I got really depressed the other day. That hasn't happened to me in a long time.  Not like that anyway.  But I'm better now.  I'll probably get really angry in a few minutes though.  Stick my tongue out.  Like this :P

Until the anger comes enjoy this:


Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Treasury Link

I made a fun little treasury over at etsy if you are interested.

(Teething baby whining in the background.)

Monday, April 16, 2012

Oh, Man!

It's been a rough couple of weeks.  I watched all the Hoarders episodes and lost my motivation.  I enlisted Mike to help yesterday and he brought all my stuff down from the baby's room and it's now sitting in the living room.  But I think with a little bit of work, I can organize it and get rid of a few more things.  Yay!  Now I just need to get some kind of curtains together and maybe a crib and Linus will have his own room!

Last weekend was the eventful one though.  After what seemed like months of coercion, Molly bumped one of her front teeth on the strawberry container and it fell out. But she still refused to pull the other one.  Then Mike got some free baseball tickets that night I let Molly eat popcorn, cotton candy, and drink a whole bottle of grape soda.  So, after the tooth fairy and the Easter Bunny came, Molly threw up.  I had to clean that up and convince Molly to go back to sleep instead of trying to find all her eggs.  

Then the following Tuesday the other tooth started bleeding and there was this black bubble underneath.  I had never seen such a thing so I made her pull it.  Or rather I tried to make her pull it. Mike came home a bit early and asked to look at it.  He saw his opportunity and he flicked it out.  So glad that is finally over. Except now Linus is getting his first tooth and he's very grumpy about it. :(

We survived the tornado out break and I had three sales on etsy.  Yay! XD  I can't get stuff made to replace the stuff that sells!  But I sold my bath mat, so I have another in the works.  I'm kind of excited about that.  XD

I hope everyone had a good Easter and lets hope for no more tornadoes!  (It's not global warming.)

Out for now! 

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

I've Been Watching Hoarders Again

It seems that I am about one tragedy away from becoming a hoarder.  I'm evaluating my own attitude towards cleaning and why I hate it.  Because, actually I don't hate it while I'm doing it, just before.  And then I really enjoy have things cleaned and straightened up.  

Here's the thing though.  I have a whole bedroom that is supposed to be Linus's room, but it's still got this big pile of fabric and yarn and patterns in it.  Oh, yeah, and I'm growing some lavender up there.  But what am I supposed to do with that pile of crap?  It's overwhelming. It really is. But, I'm working on it. 

I hate to clean because I don't think I have a good example to go by.  And I didn't have good teachers about this sort of thing.  No joy, no patience, just someone else's version of perfect.  I rebelled and kept my room messy, as Molly is doing now.  I learned  to hide everything out of sight, tucked away, bursting at the seams, always threatening to tumble out, to expose me for who I really am.

And this is who I am:

Messy, lazy, incompetent,  unable to carry out simple instructions.

Except that wasn't who I was at all.  It's not who I am.  It's someone else's version of me.  The world made sense to someone else if I exhibited those qualities.  Everything had to be a struggle, a battle, a challenge--one that I could never win anyway.  And rightfully so. 

I want my house to be clean.  I want curtains.  I want Linus to have his own room.  But it is just such a struggle inside.  

Overwhelmed by all the cords attached, I think, to this laptop.  Overwhelmed by the bags of yarn tucked into shelves, the dust coated typewriters(that aren't mine-see I'm doing it too-blaming), the shredded cheese dropped on the floor.  Overwhelmed by the very idea that I could be something other than what I once chose to be.  

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

A Few Cute Pictures!

Linus officially rolled over on Monday evening.  He seemed a bit surprised.  He can now sleep on his belly!  Here's a few pictures I've been taking:

We joined the Y and Molly has been wearing her swim suit around the house ever since.


Monday, March 12, 2012

I'm A Slut!

I finally know what I want to say about Rush Limbaugh.  He needs to learn his terminology. Sluts do it for free. Prostitutes charge a fee. Perverts like to watch the video tape. 

I always try to err on the side of the First Amendment, so I'm not calling for him to be taken off the air.  But I will exercise my own First Amendment right to free speech and say that I think Rush Limbaugh should be nominated Biggest Douche Bag In The Universe, formally held by that psychic guy on South Park, who kept going around saying, "I'm not a douche!"

It is Spring Break over here in Heather's Knitting Land.  I'm trying to keep Molly busy so she doesn't watch too much tv.  Today it was McDonald's and the library. And tv. XD  Tomorrow we are cleaning her room.  I'm sure it will be a day filled with whining.  But, at least I'm not an asshole like Rush Limbaugh. ;)

My boy has gotten so big.  He's already strong enough to kick Rush Limbaugh's ass.  Rush would probably just get all sweaty and pass out if he tried to fight anyone anyway.  Ha!  

Okay, enough with the mean spirited humor directed at the least humorous "comedian" ever to walk the earth. ;)

Back Soon!

Monday, March 5, 2012

I Knew I Would Pay Heavily for That One Little Date Night

Poor Sleeping Beauty got his urinary tract blocked off somehow.  I finally realized it was serious (after about two weeks) on Friday.  His poor bladder swelled up to the size of, I think she said, a grape fruit.  So anyway, two nights at the vet and eight hundred dollars later, the poor boy is doing much better.   I can't get him to take his medicine though.  Apparently they don't like the liquid.  Let's keep our fingers crossed that he doesn't do it again.

I bet you can find several blog posts where I wrote these words, but I have some ideas for etsy!  If only I can focus!  I keep getting page views on the bath mat, so I'm going to try and get a couple made.  I know how to make flowers and such now.  :0)

Well, it is time to knit and clean.  We'll see which order.

Friday, February 24, 2012

It's Friday!

I actually don't like Fridays because I have to catch up on house work all week end while Mike changes diapers all day.   But tomorrow we are actually going to finagle a date night!  Yay! First one in I don't know how long!

I made a treasury over at etsy, if you'd like to check it out.  

Molly wanted a beard beanie.  I let her pick out the yarn, and it turned out really great.  As soon as she isn't sick anymore and doesn't look hung over, I'll take a picture of her in it. I'm thinking about putting it on etsy.  Pictures to come, I guess.  XD  (Teehee!)

Thursday, February 23, 2012

I Should Really Be Sleeping

I was thinking about writing a blog about Whitney Houston as that greatest love of all has been stuck in my head, and I was going to talk about the hypocrisy of pop stars, especially ones that don't write their own music and the hypocrisy of the culture in general.  And then, and then, I didn't feel like, because it doesn't matter. Nobody is perfect.  

But I learned a new emoticon today and I had to share it.


I LOVE IT!!!!!



Monday, February 20, 2012


I wish to triumph over evil.  I wish to put away childish desires.  I wish to live and let live.  I wish to have victory over the weaker side of my nature.  I wish to show mercy to those who have also stumbled in their journey.  I wish to find forgiveness for the things that I am unable to forgive.  I wish for strength.  

My god once told me that whatever answers I seek I can find inside myself.  I must continue my search, I suppose. Because there are things I still don't understand.

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Jump Rope For Heart

I vaguely remember something from my childhood about the whole Jumping Rope thing in the 1980s, but I don't know if I remember actually taking part in it.  Now it's Molly's turn and I am going to try my damnedest to teach her about community and those less fortunate than us and giving and how easy it is to give.  Because I have realized in my quest for adulthood that when we give we don't really lose anything.   Who's with me?

Molly's webpage for the American Heart Association

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Why I Hate The Doors

Please remember when reading this that I am hardly a qualified music critic and I also haven't seen that movie, The Doors, since I was a teenager.  I may in fact not have any idea about anything.

My husband was watching a documentary on Netflix about The Doors and I made a catty comment about setting my girlfriend on fire.  Mike said that I shouldn't judge the band solely on that movie because it wasn't necessarily all factual.  So, I had to think for a minute about why I hate The Doors.

It's that they have this gimmick, this tortured artist, oh-I'm-so-weird-and-mysterious thing going on, but the music doesn't stand on it's own without the gimmick.  It's just not that good and the gimmick is bullshit.  At the tender age of thirteen (or however old I was at the time, I'm too lazy to look it up) I watched Meg Ryan walk out of a burning closet and I understood all of that somehow. It doesn't really matter to me if Jim Morrison set his girlfriend on fire or not. This scene symbolizes the idea that embodies The Doors in my mind. That idea is that everything that is good must be sacrificed for something that is, at best, mediocre.

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

I Love February!

I love February because of the sinus headaches!  And unseasonably warm Februaries are the best. To make it all better, the baby is either having sinus headaches as well, or he's hit some developmental milestone where he has figured out that he can always sleep later. These two wonderful aspects of my life culminated Sunday night, Monday morning with me weeping and sobbing uncontrollably over my screaming boy.  Mike came to the rescue though, and things are better now.  I think the crying actually helped clear some stuff out.  But I slept with that boy on my chest again last night which is not really fun.  (Shakes fist violently at sky.)

Still plugging away!

More gift sets that I need to get up this afternoon.  (Should I wake him up from his nap?)

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

A Few Products Going Up Over At Etsy

Here's what I've been working on lately.

Cotton Face Scrubbies-Because I just want to make face scrubbies like everyone else!

More soap and washcloth gift sets. 
A baby hat that by the time I got it made it didn't fit Linus anymore so I had no model!
 I wanted to do something fun for Valentine's Day but I didn't get to it.  So I'll try and get on that for next year.  ;)

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Deleted All the Pictures Off the Camera

I thought I'd share a few cute ones.  I'll try to make this the last post of cute family pictures, at least for awhile. 


First dressing up little brother like a girl moment

Sleeping Beauty eating marshmallows
my boy

Hope you enjoyed it.  Now on to other things.  :0)  (Love!)

Sunday, January 29, 2012


I am so tired.  I have a pile of stuff to photograph.  Just haven't photographed yet.  I did get the batteries in the camera though.  Oh! And now I have both black and color ink cartridges in the printer!  I am so excited! It's on!  But I am still so tired and I have to get up and take Molly to school in the morning.  

It is still sooooooooooooo on!  

Oh, no.  Some one is chirping in his little bed.   Okay he stopped.  

I can do this.  I am an adult now.  I can do what I want.  And this is what I want.  And I'll do it my.... no, no mustn't break into song.  I don't have an inner critic anymore.  I listen to my instinct and my rational thought processes.  I have worked so hard to develop those.  I know I can do it.  

Whatevuh! Whatevuh!  I do what I want!

It's only January 29th.  I still have plenty of time.  Three month, almost four month old boys take so much work--WAIT!  Did that sound like an excuse?  He does pee a lot though.  

Okay, so anyway, I've accomplished a lot.  I will get more done tomorrow.

Yay!  I just need to remind myself once in awhile that I can do it.  Old habits die hard and all that. There are things that I just can't control, but I do control how I deal with them.  I can still be a good person.

Good night!

Monday, January 23, 2012

I Miss Sleep

It's been like a week, since I last posted, hasn't it?  Has it?  I'll have to look.  

My boy is getting big and smiley.  My girl is getting tall and has turned into a bit of a smarty pants. I am assuming this is age appropriate at this point.  As someone who has a hard time allowing my own true emotions show, I'm mostly okay with it.  I can't wait until I have two kids double teaming me though!  :D  

Our money situation has improved.  I can finally pay off my epidural in a few more weeks!  Yay!   

The batteries that I found for the camera stopped working, so I had to buy some.  I am about to make a pile of items to photograph this afternoon to post on etsy.  Yay!  And I am also making a Rapunzel wig out of my yellow yarn for Molly.  Ha!   It should be funny.

Pictures to come.

Tuesday, January 10, 2012


I have terrible pop songs stuck in my head.  Mike made Molly her own file on Spotify.  At least she's not watching as much tv. I guess.  I did finally find some batteries for the camera, so I should be able to get a little work done.  I have to figure out that whole Gimp thing though, which is a long story and probably really boring.  I am super tired today because someone is teething. And I had forgotten about it and I couldn't figure out why he would sleep in my arms but scream bloody murder as soon as I put him down at one o'clock this morning.  And then he wanted to eat at five in the morning.  But here he is still beautiful.   

That's my boy!

 I know, I know.  The doctor told me already.  They don't teeth until six months.  Trust me; he's teething.  Well, I guess I will turn the Star Trek Voyager on and try to do some knitting.

Friday, January 6, 2012

Off To A Good Start-Maybe....

I was going to put some new stuff on etsy yesterday, but my camera has no batteries, my 2nd annual After Christmas Sale went well and I don't actually have any new stuff made, and I have lots of extra laundry to do because I can't afford diapers.  

However,  I do have twenty five dollars in my paypal account and I am super psyched about that.  I also have LOTS of ideas.  I also found even more new resolve this week and I am super psyched about that.  (I think.  Or am I delirious with fatigue?)  

Now to go find my ToDo List notebook, so I can organize my thoughts, and thus my actions.  And as Neil said on The Young Ones, "Everyone knows sleep gives you cancer!"


Wednesday, January 4, 2012

A List For You

I know how much everyone in the blogging world loves lists.  So, here's mine for the year.  Hopefully, I won't do anymore for awhile.  I like reading them myself, but writing them-not so much.  
I think that the whole resolution thing is crap.  I prefer to set goals and work towards them.  I don't always accomplish my goals, but I usually get pretty close. So, anywhere, here it is, my list of goals for 2012.

1.  I would like to lose about twenty pounds, but really, I need exercise.  Mike and I embarked on a plan to eat less meat (which is a bad idea when you are pregnant-just saying) several months ago. It's going well, but I have been craving all kinds of things postpartum.  The boy is almost three months old now though, and it's time to get to work.  When I get a stroller Molly and I can walk to school in the morning.  
In other words, my first goal is to eat better, get more exercise, and buy a stroller.   One thing I have learned recently is that Boca Burgers are AWESOME!  :0)

2.  Whenever I renew stuff on etsy, or create a treasury, or anything at all, I usually get a response and I usually get a positive one.  While it has taken me a long time to realize that most attention I get is actually positive, I know now, and I'm out of excuses.  The trolls don't seem to be hitting up etsy at this time and if they ever do, fuck 'em.  They are the losers, because they have nothing better to do than sit around typing nasty things to people they don't know.  It's sort of like when Lord Voldemort enters Harry Potter's body and Harry says, I feel sorry for you,  because you will never know friendship.
So, goal #2 is make money.  I can do it.  I know I can.
Part of this goal is that I have to do good things with this money that I'll be making, like paying off debt, saving money, and getting my daughter dance lessons or karate or whatever it is she wants to do.

3.  Stop yelling.  I think this one is self-explanatory.

4.  Basically, I'm going to make all my dreams come true. And I'm going to do it my way, yes, my way.  :0)

Again, here's to a great 2012! 

Tuesday, January 3, 2012


I decided to come back a day early because I am excited to get back to work.  I have still been reflecting a bit on my life and all that I've been through over the past year.

I have noticed since having given birth to my son, that when I look in the mirror I no longer see something to hate, but rather, a normal person.  As Christmas came and went this year, I realized that there is no longer anything holding me back.  What once made me feel incompetent and invisible is now falling on deaf ears.  I am human, hear me roar!

I have been thinking about what kind of people I want my children to grow up to be.  The most important things that I want for them to be is kind-hearted and adaptable.  I don't want them to get lost in the ideas of the past and settle for a way of life that does not serve them or the people they love.  And I want them to live for themselves.  I actually told Molly the other day that her life is her own, to do with what she wants.  (However, I do fear her tendency towards control freakdom--Did I just make up a word?) 

I remember once in my life when what I had planned out for myself became impossible.  I was a tender 18, and the one thing I realized then, was that no longer was I tied down to a vague, yet rigid plan of action, but that the possibilities of where my life went were endless.  If only I had gained the confidence then that I have now.  Sigh!  But the time for living in regret is gone for me now.  I feel that way again.  There are a million possibilities opening up before me again.

While I'll never be a doctor or a musician,  and I'll always be with Mike and I'll always be a mom, there are now so many roads that I can go down.  I can't wait to see what the next 36 years bring.  Hopefully it will be good and cancer free!