Yesterday sucked. I had a sinus headache that made me extra dizzy, and so, of course, I threw up. :0(
But overall things are going well. I had my screening on Tuesday for the genetic defects and everything came back fine. My phone was on silent somehow, so they called Mike and told him that we had a really low chance of such problems. I'm very grateful, as I wasn't sure what I would do if it turned out differently.
We did get some neat pictures at the ultrasound.
When I started this blog, I never meant for it to be a mommy blog. I hope I haven't crossed any lines. Sometimes I just don't know what else to write about. My days aren't that interesting, and I can only write about politics so much. I hardly ever read anymore. I really just watch Murder She Wrote and put off doing the dishes all day. :0) It seems like there are plenty of people out there waxing the philosophical about what it's like to be a mother though, so I really see no need to add to that conversation at the moment. All I can say is, it's hard and wonderful all at the same time. I guess, also, because of the pregnancy, my brain is not working the way I am used to. I am about to come out on the other side of the first trimester though, and I am hoping that means I will start feeling better. I am sad that when I try to pick up Molly my arms scream out, "No! We can't do that anymore!" I guess I will soon have a new baby to hold, but I fail to see how it will replace her, my first born that I would die and kill for. :0) Growing up can be so bittersweet.
Well, I didn't get any comments the other day, and only got a few views, so my experiment in tipsiness failed miserably. That's alright. I know that I have a lot more work to do to improve. I'm okay with that.
Frankly, I am ready to stop feeling morose. I think. It would seem that standing up for what you believe in is a lonely business, especially when you are standing up to people who previously trained you to be unable to make decisions. But I know there is one person that is depending on me to show her how it's done. It's up to her to decide someday if I did it right, I guess. I know that NOT standing up for yourself is also a lonely business, probably more lonely.
Things just keep getting better here in Oklahoma. If the leaders of our state are imbecilic in their gross insensitivity to women and their reproductive lives, what does that say about the rest of us? You know what I like to do? Make pregnant women cry in a professional setting! It's loads of fun. You should really try it sometime. Useless pregnant women! They're worse than regular women!
Okay, so I spent a lot of time this week playing Bejeweled Blitz on the Facebook. I do this sort of thing from time to time and it usually has something to do with my uterus and my five year old. (Useless women and their useless uteri!) And today is grocery day, so I'll probably fritter away another whole day doing useful things for my family, but not really getting the work done that I want to get done. It's not like I didn't do the dishes all week or change the litter boxes or anything. It's like taking Molly to school and going to P/T Conferences or making up my own conference with the teacher so that I can explain to her that Molly needs to stop "trading" stuff with other kids, none of that stuff is work, right? Just because it takes time out of my day, that doesn't make it work. Wait a minute! I don't need to justify myself to you or anyone else! (Did I just have a break through?)
I did work on a flower hair clip, but I'm not completely happy with the first version. If I can just clear my foggy head a little, maybe I can sit down with a little Murder She Wrote this afternoon and make some flowers. Cross your fingers that no one "pops" by for a visit. ( I want to be the bigger person, I want to be the bigger person, I want to be the bigger person, I want to be the bigger person......)
Back on Monday!
